After our third daughter was born, I had to give up a lot of things in order to take care of three girls under the age of 5. It’s not like I didn’t try to keep this things going, I really did. It was just really hard to keep up with anything that I tried to do with so many people that I had running around.
No matter how much I tried there just wasn’t enough “free” time for me to do the things that I liked. I would try to read a book after I had them all in bed sound a sleep. But I often found myself waking up a few hours later with my book either on my chest or on the floor next to my bed and drool dried to my face. I just couldn’t seem to get past two or three pages even though I love to read! I used to read tons of books. I was just too tired to follow through with anything. No matter what it was or how much I wanted to do it.
So, if I didn’t have the time or energy for that I really didn’t have time to do any sewing or crocheting. I would start project after project, but none of them would get finished. I tried, I really did. I couldn’t get them done during the day because I had to keep stopping to take care of the kids. I would get a project out, convince myself that today was the day that I was going to get something done! Than I would hear “Mommy, she drew all over her self with a marker!” or “Mommy!! The baby stinks!!” or my favorite “uh-oh!” followed by the footsteps of children scattering.
During that time, I found myself getting into emotional states of blah. I didn’t feel like myself anymore. All I had known for three years is doing everything for everyone else. Stuff like knowing what extra stuff I had to bring when leaving the house with all of the kids. Staying up late to finish the chores that I normally would have done during the day. Life was just one blah me day after another. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life. I love my children. I love my husband. I just felt like I didn’t know who I was anymore.
That’s why I had decided that I am going to try to do at least 20 minutes of stuff for me every day. It doesn’t matter what that 20 minutes entails as long as it was something that I wanted to do for myself. It could be so simple as taking a nap in the afternoon, working on one of the many WIPs (Works In Progress) laying around my desk, reading one of the many, MANY books on my shelf or writing a blog post.
Since I started doing this, I actually feel a little weight taken off my chest. I feel like I am re-gaining a little bit of me and I feel like a regular person again. That is a great feeling to have.
I know that this is a common issue for a lot of parents out there. I have talked to many of them about the same kind of topics. Often I hear the same things, they are just too tired to do anything at night after chasing kids around all day, cleaning and cooking.
I think that a lot of us Parents get caught up in the every day family life. It’s good to step back and ask yourself what do you want to do today? Not your spouse/significant other, not your kids, but you…. what do you want to do?
Even for a brief 20 minutes a day. Do it for your sanity. Because it will make your soul happy which in turn will make the next day better and the people around you happier because they can tell you are too.